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For over 7 years the Lord has kept me to Himself. There were times it didn’t make sense, there were times the pain was unbearable, but through it all He was right there with me. Comforting me, moulding me, nurturing me, preparing me.

In over 7 years the Lord has taught me so much about myself. He has not wasted a moment. Every second contributing to refining, restoring, refreshing a broken, weary soul. These years have been spent sitting at the feet of my Father, delving into scripture, leaning into Jesus, understanding His words, His ways, His heart. Seeking revelation on His true design for marriage, for family for relationships. It has been beautiful and it has been necessary. The road that needed to be travelled in order to equip me with the godly qualities Yahweh wanted to bestow upon me. Fruit that is now bearing forth as I walk boldly and excitedly into this new season of love and companionship.

In all His grace and mercy The Lord has seen fit to allow my path to collide with a man of God who sees the beauty of Jesus. Who understands the ways of the Lord and His design for marriage and love. There truly is nothing too hard for the Lord. I can testify.

“I am the Lord, the God of all the peoples of the world. Is anything too hard for me?”
‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭32:27‬ ‭NLT‬‬

When God says it’s time…


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Yesterday, words of love were shared in perfect unity.

The feelings had been building for some time and had intensified to the point they could no longer be confined within the depths of our fertile hearts…

Time is not standing still but rapidly moving forward….no stone is being left unturned as we seek to honour God with this union of two souls. It still feels surreal. After all this time has love truly been awakened? The kind of love that pleases God? The kind of love that stands the test of time? The kind of love that submits to the will of The Father?

I stand in awe as my Lord and Saviour showers me with the fruit of my labour.

I adore You Lord. Your faithfulness knows no bounds.

“Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy.”

Psalms 126:5 NLT

The vision of God…


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Hey friends, I’ve been meaning to fill you in on what happened after I wrote this post. You can read about it here, before I go on to reveal the outcome. Well of course my God came through in an epic way. All those years and months spent worrying and agonising over how He would work it out, when all I needed to be doing was praising Him for what He had already done and was doing in the midst. God is a provider, a sustainer and a way maker. 7 years of single motherhood and the Lord has set my feet on the solid rock of Christ. He has supernaturally provided for my children and I over and over again. A home that belongs to us, food on the table, clothes on our backs, love in our hearts!! Hallelujah!!!

God’s continuous faithfulness got me thinking about this new season I find myself in. A season that I’ve prayed and hoped for, for many years and which has come when the world has been turned upside down by a pandemic. In the midst of the impossible, God has made possible the meeting of two people, with two very similar sets of circumstances, who are on the same page when it comes to the things of God. W.O.W. It is still new and we are both earnestly seeking God for His clarity and wisdom. We want to see how He sees the situation, we want His will to be done, we want Him to get the glory from this union and this can only be achieved if what has been sent is from Him. We are slowly beginning to believe it is.

It is exciting when God gives you His vision. His vision is bestowed when you ask Him in prayer for your mind to be renewed, when your heart desires everything He desires, when all that matters is your obedience to Him, His word and His ways. The path to righteousness is narrow and it is not easy, but there is safety along that path, there is counsel along that path, there is joy everlasting along that narrow path. Do not misunderstand me, it is a challenging path to walk along, but when God is for us, who can be against us? When we abide in the vine, He equips us with His power to overcome any difficult thing. In our deepest weakness, He is our greatest strength. He must increase, we must decrease. Praise Him!

When individually and as a couple you walk closely with Jesus, when individually and as a couple you chase after Him with all that you are, when individually and as a couple you sit quietly at His feet and listen eagerly to His voice, when individually and as a couple you are quick to obey His utterings. This is the sweet place of God glorifying fruitfulness. Hallelujah!!! We are so excited about the future.

Since we have both made many errors in the past with our relationships, we are extremely sensitive to the fact that we don’t want to make the same errors again. We both realise that in the past, God was never invited into our relationships in the first place, so how could He be expected to bless or make right a union that was not built upon Him? Of course, God can turn any situation around regardless if He is in it or not. He has and continues to do so for many relationships. Sadly for me, that wasn’t my portion and for a long time I had to make peace and heal from the fact that I hadn’t invited God to dwell in any area of my life, so how could I extend an invitation to someone I didn’t know? How could I expect Him to restore and rebuild a relationship He had not been asked to help build when it first began? Thank God things are different now, that The good Lord in all His redemptive grace, love and mercy, saw fit to burst into my heart in the summery month of July 2012, save my soul and turn my whole life around. What majestic things He has done since. Yes there were soul crushingly painful times along the way, but what He has done in and through my life has been truly miraculous and He continues to leave me in absolute awe.

Friends understand me, I was beginning to lose hope in ever finding friendship with a godly man. A man who truly believes in The Lord and who He is. A man who does not scoff at the ways of The Father and think you have lost your mind, when you mention no sex or physical intimacy before marriage, a man who understands why you are asking for prayer and prays without question, a man who knows the battle we face is spiritual…..if I’m honest, before this new season burst in my life unexpectedly, I was learning to be at peace with my singleness and truth be known I was at peace. God’s peace wrapped itself around me and life as a single mother no longer felt like a burden but a blessing. Jesus was and is my all in all. In the midst of everything that is going on right now Lord, Let me never ever lose sight of You. You are Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. Every good gift comes from You and I want to continuously bring glory to Your name and draw others to You through my life and the testimony of what you have done for me and my family. I love You eternally.

“Loving God means keeping his commandments, and his commandments are not burdensome.”

1 John 5:3 NLT

The meaning of us…


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Us, a pronoun. You and me.

For years it has been just me. Me and my three blessings from God, and now we talk about us and what the future holds should the good Lord will.

Us, does something to my heart. It fills me with hope, yet my eyes remain fixed upon The One who is hope. The One who has sustained me through every high and low. The One who has allowed two lives to slowly and steadily entwine. Before there was us, there was me and my Jesus. My Husband, my Strong Tower, my Way Maker. He is your Jesus too. My Spirit is on fire. The seemingly impossible has suddenly become possible. The Lord hears our prayers and He answers. He is your Jesus too. Hallelujah!

Jesus + You + Me. This is what makes us.

“Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone? And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 KJV

A reflection…


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So here we are, the last day of 2020. God has been good.

This year has been one like no other. Still God has been good.

As 2021 waits patiently to reveal its glory, I refuse to be pessimistic about what lies ahead because God has been and always will be good.

I’m choosing to lean upon Him, as He reveals to me more of the plans He has for my life, plans I will be sure to share with you all as they begin to flourish and strengthen.

My prayer is that our faithful, Heavenly Father will continue to mold us into His image, He will continue to strengthen our faith in Him, He will continue to protect, guide and keep us, because He is God.

Happy New Year to you all and God bless.

Let God be God..


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2020 is the year that has shown me that God is faithful in every season. It doesn’t matter what you or me or the rest of the world are going through, be it the highest of highs or the lowest of lows, He is faithful. He never changes, He can not lie, He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Hallelujah.

In my last post I was filled with trepidation as I worried that I would fall at the last hurdle as God performed an incredible miracle in my life. As I write these words, The Holy Spirit is nudging me, showing me how arrogant it is to think that any miracle God performs would be undone by my falling, I do not possess the power to undo or terminate what God has already ordained to be done. Even if I fall, God has the power to pick me back up, set my feet back on solid ground and complete the good work He already started in me. WOW!! My own unbelief plagued my mind with thoughts of failure. I gave my fears more power than my faith, when God had already gone before me and worked it all out. What a complete waste of energy. I should have been using that energy to praise and proclaim that’s the kind of recognition my God deserves! Glory!

The Lord’s patience with us truly knows no bounds. When I look at my situation and what I’ve been through, I marvel at the goodness of God. A single mother for over 7 years and in that time God has blown my mind with His supernatural provision. He has renewed my mind and continuously restores and renews my health, He has provided a home for my children and I, a home that belongs to us. He has provided a career that allows me to take care of my children, He continues to cover us in His powerful and protective blood as we navigate a pandemic that appears to be turning the world upside down. Predictably, fear often seeks to grip me, but how can I remain fearful when I’ve seen for myself how the God I serve operates? He is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I run to Him and I am safe. I can not afford to operate in unbelief in these perilous times. It is not easy and there are many distractions, but only God can bring me the peace that surpasses all understanding in the midst of the shakiness of the world right now. Only God in all His wisdom is able to keep me rooted in Him if I choose to believe. And I do. I must. I will. He is worthy of my belief, He is worthy of my faithfulness, He is worthy of my praise. Thank You Jesus!

“Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good. His unfailing love continues forever, and his faithfulness continues to each generation.”

Psalms 100:4-5

Trusting God in the midst of uncertainty


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There is a lot going on in life at the moment. I’m on the precipice of achieving unimaginable things and the adversary is coming in like a flood, attempting to plague my mind with doubt and unbelief. I truly marvel at God. He must see us carrying our problems, wringing our hands in despair, tossing and turning in bed at night, walking around as if we are carrying the weight of the world on our shoulders and think; ‘My child why are you worrying? It is done. I have gone before you, just as I always have. Everything you are fretting about has already been worked out.’

The thing is, I absolutely know this is true. Time and time again He has shown me the magnitude of his faithfulness. Time and time again He has come through for me and shown me His majesty in unspeakable ways… and time and time again I fall into the pit of unbelief when I look at my circumstances in the natural and not at Him. It all looks so impossible, so unachievable. BUT GOD!! Tuesday 1st Dec is a key day. The day I get to let out a huge sigh of relief. But why can’t I feel relieved now, why can’t I hold my head up high and walk in confidence NOW, knowing God has gone before me and made my crooked path straight? We humans are such peculiar creatures.

Lord, I’m going to do my best to put all my worries and concerns into Your hands. You know my coming in and going out, You know the plans you have for me and they are GOOD. It is of no value for me to be in despair when I serve a God who commands me to rejoice in Him, because He is worthy. So TODAY I will breath a sigh of relief and TODAY I will give praise because my God is a miracle worker and nothing is impossible for Him.

“O Lord, I will honor and praise your name, for you are my God. You do such wonderful things! You planned them long ago, and now you have accomplished them.”

Isaiah 25:1 NLT

The glory of God


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I have a hard lump on my knee. It’s extremely painful when I bang it. It’s been there for four years and has recently got bigger. I noticed it was getting bigger during lockdown and thought it may be due to the running regime I began in late January along with doing more HIIT workouts. You may be wondering why did I leave it for so long, but I really didn’t think anything of it when I first experienced the pain after banging it on a table all those years ago. I was knee deep in my teacher training and focused on so many different things, my health took a back seat. Now I’m praying that the delay in getting it seen to doesn’t mean I’ve allowed something sinister to manifest. I’m definitely getting more aches and pains in my leg which is a concern. I’ve had a scan at the hospital and I’ve been referred for more investigation. I get nervous when it comes to investigations and biopsies, but as always I’m trying my hardest to trust God and not worry. It’s ridiculous how the mind chooses to believe the worst even when you serve a God who has shown you how He can come through for you time and time again. When I begin to feel anxious I’m reminded of the story in the bible when Jesus heals the blind man. The disciples ask what sin must he or his parents have committed for him to be born blind. Jesus responds by saying

“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” John 9:3

Glory, glory hallelujah!! Wow Lord!! The Holy Spirit is so powerful and provides so much comfort in our time of need. Nothing we go through is ever in vain and God will get the glory from your story just as He will mine. I trust Him.

When God moves your mountain


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For years there was a particular set of circumstances I was facing that would have me wringing my hands with worry. I would have frequent episodes where I’d be racking my brains, thinking of ways in which I could achieve the seemingly unachievable on my own. I knew I had to trust God and He would come through for me like He always did, but when I looked at the facts of my situation all I could see was lack. Nothing added up and the analyst in me, that wants to know the details of how everything is going to work out before it happens, couldn’t fathom how God was going to be able to pull this one off, because in the natural it appeared that I didn’t have enough. And therein lies the problem. Me consistently putting limits on my limitless God. There is absolutely NOTHING on this earth that is too hard for Him. He who created the heavens and earth, He who breathed life into mankind, He who raised His only begotten son from the dead, can surely make a way for me. As I write these words I’m magnificently encouraged in my Lord and Saviour once again. I am in awe of His miraculous and unending power. The mountain I worried about for so long, God moved. He cleared my path and made a way, just like He said He would. Hallelujah Lord.

“For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.”

Isaiah 43:19 NLT

My God, my God. I hang my head when I think back to the times where I was convinced I could only achieve what I needed to achieve if I had a husband by my side, but God showed me all I need is Him. He is my saviour and redeemer. He is my ever present help. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me, not man. Phew Lord, You truly are awesome. I’m overwhelmed by Your supernatural provision and your unchanging faithfulness to me. Even in the midst of my doubt and unbelief…

Lord help me to hold on to these moments as I experience more trials and tribulations. Help me to lean on You and not my own understanding as I navigate the challenges of life. You always go before me, You always make my crooked path straight, Your word is always a lamp to my feet. My mind is blown by you.

When your child tells you to Trust God…


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I am struggling with double mindedness. This season we are currently living in has me full of faith, yet at the same time fear often grips me and makes me want to retreat into myself.

As the mother of three children, since lock down has eased I have sought to get out more with them. We have gone to the beach, gone to the shops for school supplies, eaten out at a restaurant to celebrate a family member’s birthday, gone to my parents house. You may read that and think; wow this woman is living her life…I’m trying to, but it is hard. After every occasion, I’m gripped with the thoughts, have I put my children and myself at risk? Have I put my parents a risk? Are we going to get sick? My body is aching, am I coming down with something? It’s so tiring. And I know it’s not of God. I’m torn between living a life completely sheltered, which is impossible, (especially as I’m a teacher and about to be back in the classroom in a few days), and living my life to the fullest, which is accepting invites to family celebrations, going on the date, meeting up with friends…but fear always tries to interfere.

Thank God for Jesus who comforts and reassures. Just yesterday He used my second born to speak to me and allay my fears. We went to my parents house briefly and I told my children to come out to the garden as opposed to staying inside. In the back of my mind I’m always thinking about safety and keeping risks to a minimum. Nevertheless it was only me who ended up staying in the garden, my children went inside to play with their adorable two year old cousin. Hearing their innocent laughing and giggling was such a joy. Unfortunately the enemy almost immediately tried to steal that joy…BUT GOD..

On the way home, I asked the children why they hadn’t listened to me and stayed outside in the garden, my 11 year daughter responded..’Mum are you saying we have Coronavirus?’

‘Of course not,’ I said ‘but as nanny and grandpa are older and people can sometimes have the virus and not know it, we must take precautions.’ Then came the spirit filled response from my daughter;

‘What about trusting God?’

WOW!!! I had to just button my mouth right there and then and say forgive me Lord and thank you dear daughter. She is right, I know she is, I say this myself all the time; TRUST GOD and yet still the worry and fear creeps in, but I must Him.

I’m learning that trusting God is something that needs to be exercised every moment of every hour in every day. It’s a process, it’s an act of faith that I must put to work at all times. Lord increase my trust, increase my faith. Help me to cease seeing faith and trust as arrogance but as boldness in you. My life truly depends on it.

“(For we walk by faith, not by sight:)”

2 Corinthians 5:7 KJV