The Lord has truly kept me.
To be honest, it’s not like there have been any real opportunities for my celibacy to be tested, because The Lord has truly kept me hidden. I have not had to really deal with frequent issues of lust and there have been no propositions from anyone for sex….LOL…so I have been able to get on with my life without feeling like something is missing. In all honesty The Lord has transformed me so radically, my mind has been completely renewed in the area of sex and relationships. Before, I would measure what I should or shouldn’t be doing in accordance to the world and its ways. Now I align my identity and actions with the word of GOD!! He is the authority in my life. His way is PERFECTION and PROTECTION!! Come on somebody!!!
Of course I have my moments, but I’m so busy with my children and The Lord is doing such a miraculous work in other areas of my life, I can honestly say His peace and His contentment supersede any lack of physical contact that has been absent these last four years. He has truly made me whole in Him. Hallelujah!
Early on in my salvation, my flesh yearned for intimacy and there were fleeting moments I contemplated throwing myself at any man that took an interest. Thank God He blocked those opportunities.
Now if the situation arose, I believe The Lord has strengthened me enough to know what is good and right in His sight. I am waiting for my season of celibacy to be broken within a Christ centred marriage and so I wait.
I wait for the man God has for me. The man who will love my children and I as Christ loves the church, the man who will lead through serving, the man who will sanctify and cleanse me by the washing of water with the word, the man who I will follow as unto The Lord. GLORY! GLORY! GLORY!
I often prepare myself for a life where I will remain single, but I keep sensing in my spirit that this is not what God has planned for me and so I wait and watch and pray….
“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself up for it; that he might sanctify it, having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the church to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.”